Imagination is taking it a little slow

Thank heavens my imagination is taking it a little slow today ,
i know there is loads of stuff to imagine
there is life to put in order and oh so much !
but still the thought of just sitting around and doing nothing but type whatever comes to mind seems like a tempting thought ! The day , i was sick and had to work ! I dont seem to enjoy doing that much now a days. It seems like my workaholic days are over... I knew it would seem a little empty before i start savoring life around me again. I was reading my blog the other day and the transition from being a fancy poet with lines that dont match to writing hard core reality has been slow.I wish i could jot down my random pieces of paper here someday. I guess the latest fad is to be heard ! but like people around me say - "Ak life is a fad" Naah i am lying it's more like Ak YOUR life is a fad ! So well "HIP HOP DANCING HERE I COME" :))

Back up

After years i opened my CD case again , to transfer all the backup data into my new machine that now had the capacity to drown everything i had done in the past and still have room for more. With each cd i realised more and more how distracted a person can get with things happening around and loose balance/focus. When i entered the "real" world of work and with each passing day drowned myself more and more in it , the back ups in the cd cases got shoved inside the deep ends of the store room shelf.
And today i sit right here transferring all the cd data on to my "alive" hard disk , the one that is used often and it is almost unreal to see the amount of data i forgot about my ownself . And with each cd that i transfer , each piece of music , each piece of writing , each piece of design and drawing - I wonder if i am looking at myself or hacking into someone else's account.
I guess i am just proud - Weirdly proud today ! :)

Eagle Eye

Neutrality of life

It's been ages since i ve lived in this world of fancy fakeness
where i have judged people and told myself that i really dont believe in judging
I believe i have transformed and i really dont have a right to be judging my ownself so harshly
but the parameters change
In the end one just realizes - everyone really is the same person , everyone really almost always has the same thought
Some people choose to leave it , some choose to love it
Neither is right
neither is wrong
The neutrality of life seems almost brutal - i'll touch it and it will either burn , cut or sting
I am not a sad person - but i just write well when i am !
So to Life and the pink tinted sun glasses that make all rosy ! Let's hear it for a better life !

The Blade Runner

I run the blade on me
it feels so good
No i am not a Psycho
Pain is a very intelligent teacher
What you might learn in years - it is capable of teaching you in days
every cut/bruise on me has made me jump 2 instead of 1
i crave for that pain now
No i am not a Psycho
i crave to shorten the period of learning
i crave for the depth
i crave for the maturity
i crave for the teachings
i crave for the intellect
Running the blade on me is a small price to pay !

The CTRL - Z Syndrome

it's easier to erase
the actions define a lot of our thoughts
Rituals exist BECAUSE they emphasise and inculcate that emotion/feeling in us
Sadly i commit and strike CTRL-Z now
in my head i do it everyday
i commit a mistake - i do a ctrl z
i say something wrong - i do a ctrl z
i fool around i do a ctrl z
and if somebody objects - i do a ctrl z
for guilty pleasures - ctrl z
for rollercoaster rides - ctrl z
for devilish indulgences - ctrl z
for evil thoughts - ctrl z
for manipulative techniques - ctrl z
for me to be clean - ctrl z
for me to be seen - ctrl z
for me to be mean ! - ctrl z
I do a ctrl z - till i am born again !
Life is a ctrl z
I am stuck in the ctrl z syndrome ...
and my zee is stuck !
Somebody / Anybody help !